I wrote this July 2, 2007... lunch break...

And then I'm back
Back again to being ignored
After my fifteen seconds of fame
From cutting my wrist
And spilling my blood
I'm back again
Back to being ignored

What do you think? Anyway, I didn't prepare for this post. I just felt that I have to post this here and now. I guess it's women's instinct or something.

And then I'm back
Back again to being ignored

I really hate being ignored. Malamang kulang ako sa pansin or something. Basta, ganun 'yun.

After my fifteen seconds of fame
From cutting my wrist
And spilling my blood

Adelfamous pips, remember Bio? About the Microsoft... este... microscope pala... When we had our lab chuva. And I practiced... you know what. And then we looked at my blood under the microscope. It looked so stupid, pero. hehehe...

I'm back again
Back to being ignored

Alam nyo na yung feeling na parang wala kang halaga. Basta... Madrama kasi ako. Anyway, let's all try to SMILE! Kasi contagious ang frown!!!!

and...

THANK YOU TO EVERYBODY!
PLEASE READ "When Emos Attack".
Thanks.

Labels: emo, life, me, school, suicidal

I no longer want to be an emo. I can't stand faking a smile, a laugh, and everything else. I want these smiles to be real. I want to laugh about something without hurting someone, or simply myself. I want to be with somebody who doesn't expect me to be someone else. Man, I am emo! Well, you don't need to pass a test to be an emo. You don't have much of a choice! It just come slapping you on the face. It's not a choice. It just happens.

I'm no longer a freaking suicidal weirdo. But it doesn't mean the faucet of problems has run dry. It doesn't mean someone turned it off. I, myself, can't turn it. How could anybody else? But then, there were these little people passing by, who saw me crying trying to bust this damned faucet. One told me not to cut my wrist. It may come off, and my faucet will never have a chance to be turned off. Another told me he have the same problem. Knowing how it feels to be lonely, he accompanied me. But I didn't notice how close he was. I carelessly splashed some problems in his direction. I didn't knew this until I turned to look at him, walking away from my life. I'm sorry. Ei...

I stood up, and left the stupid faucet on. I looked around me. I was astounded. I tried all my life to stop the problems flowing. But, people around me, who are damn happy, have buckets, pales, and stupid looking containers; God, Family, Work. These are the things that can contain your problems. Stupid! They were there all along!!! Everybody have these jammed faucets of problems. I was not smart enough to think of something to catch my problems, instead, I waited for the time I forget about it. Now I know why it always comes back. And the pain dives into my heart deeper than usual.

To all of the problematic people: snap out of it, dude!
To all of the people who cares: thanks...
To all the people who have time for the bucket, and pales...: that's great! Keep it up!

To YOU: I'm really sorry. I know it was my fault. I was careless. But I can't take this anymore. I can't take it when we just pass by each other without a simple hello. I know I'm stupid. But please forgive me. I know what I said, but forget it. Now, I'm telling you: Sorry. I need you in my life.

Labels: emo, life, me

I wrote this July 2, 2007... lunch break...

And then I'm back
Back again to being ignored
After my fifteen seconds of fame
From cutting my wrist
And spilling my blood
I'm back again
Back to being ignored

What do you think? Anyway, I didn't prepare for this post. I just felt that I have to post this here and now. I guess it's women's instinct or something.

And then I'm back
Back again to being ignored

I really hate being ignored. Malamang kulang ako sa pansin or something. Basta, ganun 'yun.

After my fifteen seconds of fame
From cutting my wrist
And spilling my blood

Adelfamous pips, remember Bio? About the Microsoft... este... microscope pala... When we had our lab chuva. And I practiced... you know what. And then we looked at my blood under the microscope. It looked so stupid, pero. hehehe...

I'm back again
Back to being ignored

Alam nyo na yung feeling na parang wala kang halaga. Basta... Madrama kasi ako. Anyway, let's all try to SMILE! Kasi contagious ang frown!!!!

and...

THANK YOU TO EVERYBODY!
PLEASE READ "When Emos Attack".
Thanks.

Labels: emo, life, me, school, suicidal

 

I no longer want to be an emo. I can't stand faking a smile, a laugh, and everything else. I want these smiles to be real. I want to laugh about something without hurting someone, or simply myself. I want to be with somebody who doesn't expect me to be someone else. Man, I am emo! Well, you don't need to pass a test to be an emo. You don't have much of a choice! It just come slapping you on the face. It's not a choice. It just happens.

I'm no longer a freaking suicidal weirdo. But it doesn't mean the faucet of problems has run dry. It doesn't mean someone turned it off. I, myself, can't turn it. How could anybody else? But then, there were these little people passing by, who saw me crying trying to bust this damned faucet. One told me not to cut my wrist. It may come off, and my faucet will never have a chance to be turned off. Another told me he have the same problem. Knowing how it feels to be lonely, he accompanied me. But I didn't notice how close he was. I carelessly splashed some problems in his direction. I didn't knew this until I turned to look at him, walking away from my life. I'm sorry. Ei...

I stood up, and left the stupid faucet on. I looked around me. I was astounded. I tried all my life to stop the problems flowing. But, people around me, who are damn happy, have buckets, pales, and stupid looking containers; God, Family, Work. These are the things that can contain your problems. Stupid! They were there all along!!! Everybody have these jammed faucets of problems. I was not smart enough to think of something to catch my problems, instead, I waited for the time I forget about it. Now I know why it always comes back. And the pain dives into my heart deeper than usual.

To all of the problematic people: snap out of it, dude!
To all of the people who cares: thanks...
To all the people who have time for the bucket, and pales...: that's great! Keep it up!

To YOU: I'm really sorry. I know it was my fault. I was careless. But I can't take this anymore. I can't take it when we just pass by each other without a simple hello. I know I'm stupid. But please forgive me. I know what I said, but forget it. Now, I'm telling you: Sorry. I need you in my life.

Labels: emo, life, me